Visiting the grave of a loved one opens us up and makes us realize that we need help in many aspects of life. We pray to God at these times and ask our loved one to be an advocate on our behalf. While visitation is permitted at almost any time, it is considered especially appropriate to visit the graves of loved ones at naturally reflective times when a person is focused on what is really important in life:
(please note that Jewish cemeteries are usually closed on the Sabbath and holidays)
You may want to recite a meaningful psalm or poem during a visit to the gravesite. Traditional Jews may study a short passage from the Mishnah [an early rabbinic legal code] or recite "El Malei Rahamim."
It is not a Jewish custom to bring flowers to the cemetery. It is a Jewish custom to place a simple stone on the grave marker during each visit. The stone is a symbol of eternity, representing our eternal devotion to uphold the memory of our beloved...our connection lives on and will never die.